at.first.sight

I remember the first time my interest in sex was peaked… for whatever reason my parents kept a copy of “The Joy of Sex” on the bottom of a bookshelf near my room. I knew the word “sex” and have always been very curious so, of course, I was going to reach for that yellow beacon of knowledge. When I opened the book the door to my sexuality opened as well.

Not a smart move on my parents part.

Images of a naked woman intertwining her body with a man flashed before my eyes.

Each page was more enthralling than the next. I had so many questions–why is he kissing her there? Why does she have hair under her armpits? What exactly are they doing? Why am I getting a weird tingling sensation down there…?

And just like that… my slutty little self was born. I had awakened!

It seemed like I was always horny (still kind of am). I was masturbating at a very young age not knowing exactly what I was doing besides whatever it was felt good. It seemed natural… it is natural.

I didn’t really think about boys and their contributions… you could say I was a late bloomer in that department. Don’t get me wrong, I was for sure a make out whore from seventh grade until I actually did the dirty deed my senior year of high school, but that’s typical the furthest I would go.

I mean I saw my first penis on accident. There was a boy, who consequently I would make out with later in life, who was changing during a swim meet and it just sorta flopped out of his Speedo. I only caught a short glimpse of it, but it was enough. I didn’t see my next one until I was with the boy I would lose my virginity to.

It’s a very clear memory… We were parked in the parking lot of a dance shop where I used to purchase all my jazz and tap shoes. *Side note* I was a musical theater kid (thought I would throw that out there because that might also explain the freakiness). The magic happened in his dad’s dark blue Tahoe… little did I know that poor car would end up seeing a lot of shit. Let’s be honest, I was bent over that middle console more times than I could count.

We slipped back into the middle seat.

He and I had been making out for a good three months and he may have touched my boobs and fingered me a little bit and by this time I was ready. I was ready. I was ready to see my first penis up close and in person.

He was a nice enough person. He made me feel beautiful and I was comfortable with him… I ended up falling in love him and having many more firsts with him. BUUUUT back to the penis… he was much more experienced than I was but he thought my nervousness was cute. I asked a lot of questions… and he slowly pulled down his pants and I just sort of stared out the window until I was feeling brave enough to make eye contact with it.

There it was illuminated by the moonlight and standing so straight. I had nothing to compare it to at the time but I can now say it was slightly above the average penis size.

“Can I touch it?” I said. And just like that I reached down with a shaky hand and introduced myself to my first penis.

And so it began.

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